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Rachel's avatar

yeah...I definitely have similar feelings. for most of my relationships I've always felt like I'm more deeply invested than the other person is in me and it kinda sucks lol. (but then again there is also a lot wrong with my brain and I get attached very easily so maybe I am the odd one here 😂)

outside of my few friends who are unemployed, it feels borderline impossible to find regular time to even message with most friends because everyone is constantly busy. we've been sold an individualistic mindset our whole lives basically so (some) people feel bad about having to rely on others (emotionally or otherwise), people's time and energy being depleted by work that doesn't pay enough to survive since we're in a cost of living crisis, then add on all the terrible things we see happening on a daily basis and no wonder people feel disconnected. I've never gotten the appeal of ai as a replacement for people, like you said it's basically a simulation that regurgitates from all the data that has been entered into it. like idk maybe it's just my autism but if I'm seeking human connection and I don't have the ability to interact with another human, I'm going to watch a TV show and I think I probably get more out of that since I am still emotionally connecting to a piece of art made by people. Anyway it's a bad brain day and idk if I'm coherent lol so I'm gonna stop rambling lol but agreed, I don't like where things are heading w this reliance on ai and everyone isolating further and further (and I say this as a disabled shut-in lol)

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allyson.'s avatar

i completely understand what you mean here, rachel, and i agree. as someone who was raised in a highly community-based culture it's so jarring to face the real world, which is much more individualistic. but i think if there are people like you and me and the rest of my lovely readers on here as well as the people i see writing about it, i think we will be okay.

i hope you're having a better day. all my love <333

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valeria's avatar

you managed to find the words for something that has been dissonantly swirling in my mind for months. wish things were as raw as they used to feel. this is incredible. i wish i could put this in everyone's hands as a reminder. 🤍🤍🤍

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allyson.'s avatar

valeria, this is so sweet and i appreciate you taking the time to leave such a kind and important comment. thank you so much for reading, angel <3

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Moone's avatar

gorgeous and raw as always

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allyson.'s avatar

always so happy to see you. thank you for being here. x

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Moone's avatar

🤍🤍

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kiki.'s avatar

i think that caring, to some extent, is part of what makes us fundamentally human. there is such a lack of caring in today's world because there is no room for it between the overwhelm of ai and the constant push to be nonchalant and mysterious. being an open wound doesn't make you less human, though; if anything, it only shows that you still bleed like one, which is more than a chatgpt therapist can say.

fine words butter no parsnips. the way your words cut so brutally has always been beautiful.

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allyson.'s avatar

the nonchalant/mysterious movement will in fact be what kills us lmao. i love you so much, kiki. so glad to know you <3

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hnwrote's avatar

watch 'Slavoj Zizek on synthetic sex and "being yourself"' on youtube <3333

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hnwrote's avatar

my honey bunches of oats I appreciate you dearly <3

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taylor borcheller's avatar

allyson, this is my favorite of your essays to date. no coherent thoughts right now but i hope you know that your words here have burrowed inside of me and i will scoop them out when i’m feeling lonely. i genuinely adore you

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alisonbeecee's avatar

very scary to grow up when this world is in this state, where everything is a bit too performative and accessible. but people like you remind me there is hope, youre a deep breathe after endless pants and sighs, thank you for writing!!!

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lindsey peters berg's avatar

keep raging against artificial intimacy...i'm with you <3

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