hip swell vol. iii
hip swell vol. iii
my list of favorites: june - july.
i’m writing this in word. i hate word.
I haven’t even renamed this. Document 1. Written in Sitka Text in size 10 even though I love Times New Roman.
I have a dull headache, a small gift that comes with the beginning and end of my menstrual cycle. There’s pressure along my sinuses that signals exhaustion and stress. I can feel the undereye bags no one can see. My skin is calming from its regular period-sanctioned breakout and irritated from my fingers’ constant drive across it. I’ve taken Vitamin C and two large, bone-white Magnesium pills and am now on my second cup of coffee.
I slept until one in the afternoon, and I was upset with myself. I’m an early riser. 9 am or nothing. So, I feel bloated and wasted away, the day slipping through my fingers. My dog’s been walked without me and fed without me, and I feel rather...useless.
My head hurts and my university haul has come in. It’s year three of five in September. I’m irritated because Dove stopped making my favorite pomegranate and shea butter body scrub or at least I couldn’t find it on Amazon. Then again, I didn’t look any further. I got crushed cherry and chia seeds instead.
I checked again and they do have it and for some reason, it makes me sad. I’ve ordered it, even though the spending seems opulent.
August is my worst month. The heat is mean and makes me feel swollen with sadness. I keep going to sleep because I feel better then until I wake up and the cycle repeats.
My mother is on the phone and doing that immigrant parent thing where they have both headphones in and are speaking at full volume. Still, I’m sitting in the kitchen with her because I don’t want to be alone. It’s part of the reason I’m writing this in Word. I want to keep you a secret from her.
Despite all of this, I want to give you the things that have brought me joy these past two months and I hope you can find something that speaks to you. I’m my mother’s daughter. I know how to give. It’s a good thing.
After, I may take a shower in my mother’s large blue bathroom. Her shower is two years redone and completely exposes you, all glass except for the one wall that’s inlaid with two shelves holding the olive oil and almond body wash I like to use.
I’ll smell earthy, like skin. I might change the sheets and catch up on my assigned reading for book club. Maybe it’ll help ease the pressure from beneath my cheeks. I wish someone were here to push it out.
I think of the girl who’s in love with her chiropractor and I understand. If someone eased my body better than I could, I’d be sure to fall.
⟡ literary pieces: essays + analysis.
Gratitude by
( Note: I sobbed my eyes out actually and read this like five times. This is truly how it feels to have summertime sadness. I sent this to a friend and they told me “It’s not your fault you’re insane. The southern heat does this to women like you.” I laughed. )
I Can Feel My Heart in My Left Hip / Natural Witness by
( note: I want to eat this piece. It gets more beautiful the more I re-read. )
When you touched my collar bone by
love notes 04 | The First Green by
( Note: I love Lyndsey and her curation. She’s so insightful and just a beautiful person. People like her fuel the world with their outlook on life. )
Why are all my clothes named after humans? by Stephanie Buck.
so what do we all mean by ‘slow living’ by
( Note: This is buried in my brain. I’m obsessed with it. )
⟡ interviews and profiles.
Michelle Li on Beauty, Growth, and POIRET
( Note: I'm currently on a stylist/MUA fix. The newest newsletter piece I'm working on is because I was thinking of Pamela Anderson and how she stopped wearing makeup when her MUA died. I love the deep relationship creatives can have with their clients and how you can tell how much they love each other. )
Lunch with Simon Porte Jacquemus
( Note: I'm revisiting Simon's wedding because it’s one of my favorites, and read this interview with him. I'd love to get lunch sometime. )
⟡ books.
Where Are You, Echo Blue by Hayley Krischer.
Godshot by Chelsea Bieker.
Soft Goods at the Housewife Market by A.
⟡ films.
Ex Machina (2015) dir. Alex Garland.
MaXXXine (2024) dir. Ti West.
The Handmaiden (2016) dir. Park Chan-wook
⟡ shows.
House of the Dragon (2022 - )
⟡ music.
“This Mess We’re In” by PJ Harvey, Thom Yorke
“Beautiful People Beautiful Problems” by Lana Del Rey ft. Stevie Nicks
“Kate Spade” by Coco & Clair Clair
“E-Coli – Instrumental" by The Alchemist
“Dirty Laundry” by Don Henley
“Sasurai” by Hako Yamazaki
“To The End (La Comedie) - 2012 Remaster” by Blur – the end is my favorite part.
“Will I See You Tonight?” by Devendra Banhart ft. Vashti Bunyan
“Don’t Go Back to Paris” by Remy Bond
( Note: I need this on Spotify or I'm gonna spin in a circle and die. )
⟡ podcasts.
“The South African Crocodile Center” from the After Work Drinks podcast.
⟡ wishlist.
( Note: I kinda love smelling naked and clean. )
( Note: The plan is to wear it like a sweater. )
ADA Women’s Oversized Blue Hoodie.
⟡ brain dump. — things that have been sticking with me.
- has these notes where he documents slips of conversations and they make my day when I see them. I love quiet, little joys.
this post.
olivia cooke & taylor zakhar - perez brain rot.
jacob elordi’s humungous baby deer eyes
street style inspo: zoë kravitz, zendaya, elizabeth debicki, dua lipa.
eugenia diaz’s youtube channel. my favorite videos are linked below.
melanie locke’s 5 am morning ranch routine.
this video about navigating dating & sex when you’re overly sensitive.
coldstonedreamery on tumblr’s answers to her asks.
currently rewatching the great and i’m obsessed with the costume design.
when clothes are named after women.
these upcoming films: Flesh of the Gods, The Drama, Queer, Nosferatu, On Swift Horses, Anora, The Last Showgirl, The Uninvited, & Babygirl.
I love when film posters get updated on Letterboxd because it’s a silent acknowledgment of progression. I’m the most excited for Babygirl, On Swift Horses, Anora, & The Last Showgirl.
this modern english country home in paradise valley, Arizona.
outsider house.
kassiopi, greece.
ahhh! my first ever mention in these kinds of posts!!! 💗💗 thank you so much your writing is exquisite by the way and so is your taste
thank you endlessly for the kind words! your comment made me cry. real summertime sadness girls know what’s up!